Mommy's Project 52:22 Working

This entire family plans its schedule around Daddy's work schedule. Since I am staying home right now and neither of my kids are in school, everything revolves around when Daddy is off work or when Daddy gets home. This will all change. My oldest will enter kindergarten this fall and when my daughter is old enough to either start kindergarten (fall 2015) or even sooner if she goes into a full time preschool program, I will go back to work and life will change even more dramatically. I can't really comprehend how all that will work. So for now, I intend to enjoy this last spring semester before my son starts Kindergarten because then his school schedule will probably even dictate when Daddy can take his vacation. It will become the dictating schedule.

I mention that Mommy once had a job to my son and he said, "Mommy, you can't ever get a job. You need to take care of us." So for now this family is my work and my joy. But when I think of the word working, I am thinking ahead to a time when I must re-enter the work force. As with most things, when the time comes, I will probably do it slowly and re-enter a day or two at a time and the family will adjust to the new routine. As for now, I am thankful everyday that my work is my family.

On a side note - my in-laws came up for Christmas and are staying with us for a few days. My husband and I will be married 9 years on the 28th and we are leaving for a two day kid-free local get-away! I am so excited. Since we have no family nearby to watch our kiddos this will be an awesome treat. Merry Christmas and a Happy New 2012 to all!

Mommy's Project 52:21 Shopping

Shopping has changed since I had kids. With a 5 year old and an almost 2 year old with me in most cases, shopping has become a very planned process. Things I think about when preparing to go shopping with my kids.

Do I have a fully loaded diaper bag including snacks, drinks, and activities?

Does the place I am going have carts? Even better if they have big kid carts and/or carts in the shapes of cars or spaceships.

How wide are the aisles of the store? Bed, Bath, & Beyond, Michael's, or Hobby Lobby have way too narrow aisles.

When I get to the store I look to see if the cart is dirty, wet, cold, or has broken safety belts.

I check for sanitary wipes to wipe off the front of the cart.

I try to park next to a cart return so when I am finished shopping, it is easier to deposit kids back in car seats and return cart to the cart keeper.

While I am shopping, my attention is always split between quickly finding the items on the list and keeping up a conversation or eye on the kids. Someone is always losing a shoe, dropping a snack, or reaching for something.

You might think all of this takes a lot of time but it really doesn't. It is something I do without thinking. What made me think through this was my husband took the two kids alone to shop for Mommy for Christmas. I can't remember the last time he was out alone with the two kids shopping because if he is along, we are usually out as a family. I thought about running through my this-is-how-you-take-the-kids-shopping list but I decided that he really didn't want me to tell him how to do it. So I just kept my mouth closed. I will let him find his own way. I know they will have a great time shopping with dad.

I didn't have any pictures of us shopping so I call Dad on the cell phone and told him to snap a couple of pictures of them shopping. Here is what I got from his cell phone. Looks like fun!

Mommy's Project 52:20 Cooking

Cooking is something I still find frustrating. It is not my pleasure but something I do because it need to be done. It needs to healthy, it needs to have variety, it need to be something that both my husband and my kids will eat, and it need to be done quickly and efficiently. I have tried lots of different approaches and am still looking for the best way to do it.

I tried index cards with 30 different meal plans and then each week, I will deal out 7 different meals and shop for the ingredients. It worked for a while but then I grew restless with it. Then I tried a weekly meal planner on the refrigerator and planned for the week. It works pretty well as long as I can pick the meal that day depending on circumstances. If I am having a great day, I can spend more time at the stove or prepping veggies but if it is a not so good day then I want something that can be thrown in the oven and baked. With the recent move meal planning has been thrown out the window and replaced with easy to make meals or take-out. I am ready to get my kitchen in order and get back on track.

My son is a picky eater and so I have tried to include him in the meal planning and veggie picking. My husband gets frustrated because I don't make his favorite foods as much. But they are usually not things the kids will eat so he gets what he likes less often.

I have a new kitchen and a new opportunity to get this cooking thing to work for me. I don't think I will ever love to cook but I want to make it more enjoyable and less frustrating. I am looking forward to reading about how other moms handle the chore of cooking.

On the fun side, I do bake with the kids but that is the not the same thing as cooking supper/dinner. Here are some pictures of us making our Christmas cookies this week. They both took their jobs very seriously. I am glad that Daddy likes to eat cookies no matter the color of the frosting or how many sprinkles or fingerprints are on the cookies.

Mommy's Project 52:19 Folding

In honor of this week's topic, I decided to see how letting the kids help fold clothes would work out. It started well but in the end I think I would prefer just to fold them myself while they play around me.

My five year old son can fold washcloths and hand towels but he prefers to fold them his way. He quickly assured me that he could fold all the clothes and I could put them away.

My daughter was very good at picking out clothes and handing them to me but she also wanted to do more.

They both took the job so seriously and kept at it until they proudly announced they were finished. I took their stacks of clothes into the correct bedroom and quickly re-folded them as I put them away. I try to involve the kids in lots of my chores around the house but folding clothes didn't work out for me. Do your kids help you fold laundry?

Mommy's Project 52:18 Styling

I am not good at letting my child dress himself. I have a sweater holder in my son's closet with a complete outfit in each section. He just grabs one and put everything in one section on and then he is good to go. This is the result when he goes for it himself.

(Side note: We have arrived and are in our new home. Yeah. Now for the unpacking. I was so tired that the packing has come to a halt and I have just been playing for a couple of days with the kids. We all needed some down time.)

Mommy's Project 52:17 Leading

The dictionary defines "leading" as directing or guiding. I was thinking about how much of the "leading" we do is just by living our life. I am always telling my son that how he handles himself is how his sister will learn how to handle the situation. It starts with the adults around our children. I am amazed at how much my son picks up on my feelings and notices my reactions to things around me. As we approach the Christmas holidays, I am reminded that I need to set the example of how to handle the season. I can lead my son toward consumerism or the real joy in the season of giving and helping others. I am looking for new ways for us to serve others this season instead of looking to see how much we can collect under the Christmas tree. Do you have unique ways to lead your family toward doing more instead of wanting more this time of year?

Side note: The last few posts have been short due to the fact I am overwhelmed by getting us ready for the big move. My next post will be on the other side of the move. Yeah, I can't wait to get us settled in our new home. Happy Thanksgiving to all!!

Mommy's Project 52:16 Organizing

I feel exactly the opposite of organized right now. I had dreams of sorting through everything before I moved and it is not going to happen. I find myself just putting stuff in boxes hoping that I will be able to unpack slowly and the organizing will happen on the other end of this move. I do like to organize and we will have to downsize because we are going to have about 400 less square feet of space in the new house. I do feel that the space is better designed so I am hoping that will make up for some of the difference. I am really looking forward to getting us and all our stuff back in one location.

Mommy's Project 52:15 Nap Time

Yeah for nap time!! Not only are my kids happier when they get their nap, so is Mommy and Daddy. My son who is going to turn five this month has napped until very recently. He would nap from 12:30 to 3:30 everyday from when he was a little over a year to his mid fours. He has stopped napping but he still has quiet time in his room for about 30 minutes each day so I can have a break. He needed to stop napping because it made it hard for him to sleep at night. If I let him stay in his room for longer than 30 minutes he will fall asleep and then it will be a late bedtime. I think it is okay for him to stay up all day since he will be going to Kindergarten next fall and he needs to build his stamina up for the long school day. He still gets tired around supper time but now with the time change he will go to bed between 7:30 and 8:00 and that is perfect for me.

My daughter who is 22 months old is in the great one long nap phase. She now naps pretty much everyday from 12:30 to 3:30 and still goes to bed between 7:30 and 8:00. It is awesome and I love it! It gives my son and I time to work on things that are better done when sister is asleep. It might be a movie and popcorn, a game with small pieces, or computer time for my son. After Christmas, we are going to try a little "home schooling" to get ready for Kindergarten. I mentioned in my last post we are moving and as of now there are no openings in any of the preschool programs that I am interested in where we are moving. So we might only be able to do a Mom's Day Out program twice a week this spring.

The only thing I have consciously done is to make napping a priority. I set up our schedules around nap time as much as possible so that we are home between lunch and 3:30 pm. Occasionally when I need a nap, I will lay down beside my son as he reads in bed and get a quick nap in while he is doing his quiet time. My husband likes to declare everybody nap time after church on Sundays. It makes for a nice relaxing lazy Sunday when we don't have anything else scheduled. It has not been happening with this move but it is something we hope to be able to put back into the schedule after the move.

(Note to self: I need to take some pictures of them sleeping, I couldn't find any in the last 6 months.)

Mommy's Project 52:14 Fixing

We are in the process of a big move. When we moved here 18 months ago, I realized that I let my feelings about the move show and it made the move harder on my son. This time I need to do a better job making this move a positive experience for my son. This weekend we started the process of moving our life from here to there. We closed on a house on Friday. Then we camped out in the house for the weekend. My husband and I thought a good introduction to the neighborhood would be trick-or-treating.

Letting my son take some personal ownership of his room was another way we felt we could get him more excited about this move. My son got to make his bedroom personal by adding dinosaur decals to the wall. We him decide where to put them in the room and kept our interference to a minimum. His only rule was they had to be higher than his sister could reach.

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He wanted to help paint his sister's room. We didn't know if he was old enough but we gave him a chance and he made us so proud. He worked so carefully with the paint. Then we added some flower decals on her wall.

This is her room all fixed up.

It was a good start. When we were done, my son looked at me and said, "So we can stay here forever? Or until Daddy gets laid off from his job again, right?" He is exactly right and maybe even then. So I am doing my best to be positive about all things involved with the move because I know I have little eyes watching how I handle the move and I want to fix all those scared feelings he has about moving one more time. I think the painting and decorating even got me excited about this new chapter of our lives.

Mommy's Project 52:13 Bathing

For a little over a year we have had to live without a bathtub. I never knew how much I would miss one until I didn't have the option. Here is a picture of the work around we used with the kids. I have gotten used to this method and because of the large shower stall, splashing and playing are not a big mess for me. We will be moving next month and we will have bathtubs again. I think my son will have good memories of his time bathing in the grey plastic tub.

Mommy's Project 52:12 Time Out

When I think of time out I think both of time out for discipline with children and time out for moms to be away from their kids. For me, the latter of the two is most important. When I get my “me” time I find that I am a happier mom and the need for time out for the kids is much less.

I use time out a lot less than I thought I would as a mom with my son. When he was younger, in his 2’s, we would do more of a time in. He would have to sit next to me on the couch until he calmed down. My husband would often hold him until he was calm. We also didn’t have the problem of making him stay in time out.

When he was in his 3’s, we used time out a few times. He would have to go to his room until he could re-join the group. He takes discipline pretty seriously and gets very upset when he is corrected so it has been pretty easy to take a more relaxed approach to time out. We just didn’t use it very much as a discipline tool.

Now that he is in his 4’s, I still don’t use a traditional view of time out. I use more of a separation from the problem. That can be a separation from his sister. We have two play mats and they are sometimes required to each be at their own play area until they can try playing together again. The other thing is to be separated from the toy or activity that is the problem.

Probably the easiest occasion to use time out for me is when I am with other families in a large group situation such as a play date at the park. This is an occasion when sitting on the sidelines of the play situation fits best for us. My son is pretty shy and so he is usually not the aggressor in the group but I see a time when this might be very useful for my soon to be 22 month old.

I will be interested to find out if other moms find time out really useful and effective in their families.

Mommy's Project 52:11 Rewarding

Before I had these two kids above, I had a very rewarding teaching job. I loved it! When I got married and decided to have a child, I didn't know how I could be a great teacher and a great mom. I just didn't think I would have enough energy at the end of the day to give my best to my kids. So I decided to quit teaching until the youngest went to kindergarten. This has been the best decision for me. Almost everything I do everyday is directly related to the raising of these two young kids. Watching them grow up and being there to see all the little baby steps is my reward. I just love being their mommy!

Mommy's Project 52:10 Cleaning

As I was preparing for this week’s topic, I realized I have mixed feelings and thoughts about cleaning depending on the situation. Cleaning can be joyful, relaxing, therapeutic, painful, sickening, and just plain boring.

In the middle of a busy or stressful situation, I find cleaning can be very relaxing. If you can put all that extra energy into a clean shower, a spotless high chair, or sparkling windows it can make you feel a lot better. Having a cleaning routine and having a respectably clean house at all times makes the unexpected guest a pleasure.

If you clean all the time, your house may be spotless but you may be missing out on a fun finger painting session or sharing a book with your child. I doubt that I will regret that I didn’t clean more ten years from now.

It is a task that needs to be done repeatedly. When I became a stay-at-home mom, I tried to conquer it. But you can never claim victory because the minute it is finished, the cycle must start again. So I had to find a level of clean that would work for my family.

One helpful website that I use is www.flylady.net. I found this site to be very helpful to getting my household cleaning organized. I do not follow her entire schedule but I check in and read articles and get some great ideas from the site.

Mommy's Project 52:9 Caring

There are so many ways to demonstrate that you care. It is important for our family that our kids grow up wanting to help and serve others. Here are some pictures that show some of the ways they care for others in their lives.

My husband has the privilege of still having both of his grandmothers so my kids have two great-grandmothers. It is amazing to see how both kids seem to understand and try to be gentle with both great-grandmothers. Just by being around them, they have an opportunity to really serve others. No one is better able than a little kid to get the shoes under the bed or find the domino that dropped under the table.

One of the reasons I am glad we have two kids is the opportunity for them to love and serve each other. In this photo, my son is trying hard to entertain his sister while we attend a graveside service. He also got to witness how people comfort and care for each other in time of loss.

This is my son in 2010 getting a shoebox ready for Operation Christmas Child. We started this last year when he had just turned four. We just got our shoeboxes for this year from church this week. For more information, you can visit www.samaritanspurse.org/occ. The local food pantry is another great way for kids to serve others in the community.

It starts small but I see caring actions initiated by him occasionally. He naturally wants to help and serve and I want to do all I can to encourage service to others as a life long passion.